We were hosting a get together at our house for the Church family. This was years ago in Birmingham. It was common that we would have people over for food and fellowship. Everyone was outside sitting in lawn chairs, laughing and talking. The kids were weaving in, out and all around, getting scolded or snatched up by a frustrated parent.
I was in the kitchen preparing food to take outside, and my Pastor’s wife came in to help. You know how it is in a kitchen with several ladies working. Each one is doing her part, filling glasses with ice, pouring soda, adding serving spoons to bowls of food, washing a few pots. Sister Raggio’s task must have been to open a can of something. I suspect baked beans.
We were all chatting as we worked, content just being together. That’s when I heard the words that I would remember for the rest of my life. Over the hum of chatter and from across the kitchen, I heard, “Oh, this can opener!”
My Pastor’s Wife embarrassed me.
I literally stopped in my tracks. Clueless. What was wrong with the can opener? I walked over to see what she was referring to. It looked the same as it always did. Actually, the same as it had for years. It was only the continued look of revulsion on my Pastor’s Wife’s face that caused me to look more closely.
As I leaned in for a closer inspection, I saw what she was reacting to. Thick, caked on crud was tightly gunked into the gears and around the magnet. Who knew you had to clean an electric can opener? Not me. I had never given it a moment’s thought. I had used this particular can opener for years, and never had any trouble. It had always worked fine. It had never occurred to me that it might be important to maintain it’s appearance for guests or to sanitize it so that they wouldn’t get sick. It had never occurred to me that what was on the outside of the can opener might cause a problem if it got inside the food I was preparing.
Until my Pastor’s Wife embarrassed me.
I never told Sis. Raggio that she embarrassed me. As a matter of fact, we never spoke of it again. I realized that it had not been intentional. She had simply reacted to filth. It was so disgusting and foreign to everything that she practiced in her own life, that she reacted without thinking. I couldn’t hold that against her. I also never forgot.
To this day twenty-fiveish years later, I cannot use an electric can opener without that incident coming to mind. I examine it closely. Every. Single. Time. I don’t remember if I went to work cleaning that old kitchen tool back in the day, or if I just chunked it and bought a new one. Today, I have a sleek, stainless steel model with detachable cutting gears that can be tossed in the dishwasher at a moment’s notice.
I wonder what would have happened if I would have gotten all bent out of shape that day. If I would have reacted in anger toward my Pastor’s Wife. If I had insisted on making my embarrassment the focus instead of the dirty can opener. I would have lost my relationship with one of the most important and influential people in my life…as well as made a lot of people sick through the years.
There are things in our lives that need cleaning up. Attitudes, conversations, wardrobes, entertainments, our very thoughts. Our Pastor’s Wife is often the one who notices these things and reacts first. Let’s not be offended at her, but simply start cleaning the dirty places in our lives. We’ll retain a beautiful relationship, and not infect a whole bunch of folks with the yuk we’ve been living with for years.
Sister Raggio went to be with her Lord years ago, but the lessons she taught me are just as powerful today, if not more so. She was an anointed speaker and teacher, but I find the lessons I’ve remembered and applied the most are the ones she taught me in our day to day relationship.
I’m so glad my Pastor’s Wife embarrassed me.
POINTS TO PONDER:
-Do you have a Pastor’s Wife that can speak freely into your life?
-Have you ever become offended when a spiritual leader gave direction?
-Are there areas in your life that you know you should clean up to be more spiritually productive?
-Can you think of a time when your Pastor’s Wife embarrassed you, but looking back, you are glad she did?
*****
As always, feel free to leave a comment, share on social media and link back to http://PatVick.com.
Warm Regards, -Pat
As we approached for landing on the main island of Tongatapu, two things made an impression on us concerning Tonga and her people. From the air we saw her magnificent blowholes. It seemed to us that no one could live alongside such beauty and not be deeply affected in their souls by its splendor. We also saw her patchwork of dark, volcanic farmland. Considering their 2016 General Conference theme was to be, “FLASHPOINT: Having a Mind to Work,” those rich, fertile furrows assured us that these people were definitely no strangers to hard work.
The Tongan people are very hospitable. We were honored with a Welcome Feast when we arrived at the UPCI Headquarters Church and Bible School. The team was overwhelmed and humbled by platter after platter mounded with food that they had sacrificed to prepare.
Services didn’t begin until Thursday evening, allowing us a few days to see the sights and get our bearings. A van had been rented, enabling our group to travel together. It was during this time that we first visited Tonga’s acclaimed blowholes at low tide. Here, ocean waves crashed into porous channels of volcanic rock, and blew skyward for twenty to thirty feet, in a great symphony of spray and sound. We were also able to drive through the countryside, taking in the sights, sounds and culture of these wonderful people.
Even though they have little in the way of money or material possessions, they utilize every natural resource to enrich their lives. One example of this is their beautiful Tapa Cloth, which they make by pressing the bark of trees into paper-like sheets and decorating them with dye made from local berries. These are coveted pieces of artwork that are given as gifts in friendship and are also essential to the foundation of Tonga’s tourism. Missionary Crystal Reece said it best, “Tongans think they are so poor, but they are really so rich, and have so much to offer.”
Once the conference started on Thursday evening, sightseeing was put to the side, and pressing into the Spirit became our focus. Bro. Showalter was the day speaker. With each session he laid a solid foundation of Apostolic teaching on the New Birth. Bro. Vick was the night speaker, focusing on moving forward into new levels of faith and commitment. Sis. Showalter and Sis. Vick ministered in the ladies’ service on Saturday. The Lord had prepared each speaker with messages that built upon the conference theme, “FLASHPOINT: Having a Mind to Work.”
From the first song in the kick off service, it was apparent that the Tongan Church loves to worship. They are a naturally joyful people. This was manifested again and again, whether it was through their colorful clothing, the smiles on their faces, their beautiful voices as they harmonized in song, or their eagerness to dance with zeal in praise and worship. Since modesty is a cultural norm in Tonga, their long, fully-covered style of clothing allowed freedom in worship. The atmosphere compelled each of us to join in with exuberance.
Each message had to be translated from English to Tongan. Bro. Showalter was overjoyed that his translator was the same man who had translated for him fifteen years before as a young man. What a joy to know he was still thriving in the Church and in ministry.
The structure of the conference was the same as one would expect at our North American General Conference. This is important to note because the United Pentecostal Church work in Tonga is only forty-five years young. We were blessed to meet eighty year old, Sis. Ofa Manu. She, along with her late husband, were the first UPCI converts in 1971 by Missionary Don Dobyns.
Because of the strong structural foundation that was laid over the last forty-five years, there is a strong Bible School presence in Tonga today. We witnessed three new Bible School students graduate and be presented at this year’s conference. Sis. Crystal has worked tirelessly over the past three years in the Bible School on her first appointment, as well as several years previously in the Associates In Missions program under the leadership of former Pacific Regional Director, Bennie Blunt.
That evening, we were privileged to witness as Pacific Regional Director, Bro. Roger Buckland gave the charge to a minister and his wife receiving his Ordination License.
The 2016 Tongan General Conference concluded Sunday night with twenty-two people having been filled with the Holy Ghost. That final worship service was phenomenal as the people praised God for all they had seen and experienced. After all, it had to be enough to carry them back across the sea until the next time they could gather with their brothers and sisters in the Lord.
Monday came all too soon with the team members heading in different directions, some preparing to go home and others traveling on to scheduled conferences. The week had been so full that we hardly had the time to wonder how we would feel when the conference came to an end. Old friendships were rekindled. New friendships were forged. In both old and new, hearts were united for the cause of Missions.
